Seattle weekly The Stranger makes an annual, hilarious accounting of its mistakes. Some entries are corrections for factual errors; others are regrets of an entirely different nature. Some samples:
The February 14 issue of The Stranger referred to Seattle resident Tae Rhee as a “woman.” In fact, Tae Rhee is a man. We regret the error.
On a related note, Tae Rhee was mentioned in the February 14 issue because he had nominated Jarred Grimes to be Seattle’s Sexiest Drummer for our annual Valentine’s Day cavalcade of sexiness. Unfortunately, the printed text read “Seattle’s Sexist Drummer.” We regret the error.
Dominic Holden, news reporter at The Stranger, regrets that in an attempt to spell out the word “brassiere” in a Slog post, he mistakenly spelled it “brazier,” which actually means “barbecue.” He further regrets that upon trying to amend his error, he spelled it “brassier,” which, if anything, means “more brassy.” Holden recognizes that, as a homosexual, he should avoid subjects related to women’s undergarments.
Charles Mudede, associate editor of The Stranger, regrets that his pretty daughter did not get a chance to be a gore-and-blood-splattered Michelle Obama in The Stranger’s Halloween issue because the idea was scrapped at the last minute due to the strenuous objections of just about everyone on the third floor.
The Stranger news staff regrets that neighborhood meetings do not have open bars.
Managing editor Bethany Jean Clement regrets saying “The copy editors have been doing a really good job lately” last Wednesday, an instant jinx that caused last Thursday’s cover to read “P. 65″ under “MERYL STREEP’S FACE/AN APPRECIATION/BY CHRISTOPHER FRIZZELLE” when that piece was on page 67.
The Stranger regrets hipsters’ tight, tight pants and hopes enough blood is making it to their feet.
Stranger staffer Lindy West regrets that after her review of the lunch buffet at Lake City’s Déjà Vu Showgirls, they shut down the lunch buffet forever, causing angry strip-club lunch enthusiasts on the 206proof.com message board to declare Lindy West to be “toast” and then to post a picture of toast. However, Lindy West does not regret writing the phrase “thousands of beautiful tater tots and three ugly ones.”
Dan Savage, author of the internationally syndicated sex-advice column Savage Love and host of the Savage Lovecast, regrets using the phrase “that’s retarded” in his column and on his podcast when what he meant was “that’s stupid.” Using “retard” in that manner is, like, so totally gay.
The writers and editors of The Stranger regret that the only pens available in the office are shitty ballpoint ones. It is a further affront to have to ask the office manager for each and every one of those shitty pens.
Read them all here.
